Randy Orton Wins WWE Championship; Joan Fontaine Dead at 96

Dec. 16, 2013 — -- quicklist: 1title: Randy Orton Wins WWE Championshiptext: The puppet masters at the WWE have picked a new champion.

Randy "The Viper" Orton, who plays one of the villain types of professional wrestlers, body-slammed John Cena (whom the Social Climber once stood behind at an airport Burger King) to win the WWE's newly minted unified championship.

Apparently, the federation has historically had two separate heavyweight champs. Now they've got one. media:21230615

quicklist:2title: Joan Fontaine Is Dead text: Joan Fontaine, an Oscar-winning actress of the 1940s, mostly known for feuding with her Oscar-nominated sister for four decades, is dead. She was 96, according to a statement released by her personal assistant.

Fontaine, born Joan de Beauvoir de Havilland, starred in Alfred Hitchcock's "Suspicion." When she and sister Olivia De Havilland were both nominated for the 1941 Best Actress Academy Award and Fontaine won, the sisters reportedly never spoke to one another again. media:21230750

quicklist:3 title: Gifts for My Husband?text: The Social Climber typically does not dispense with marital advice, but here's a tip: If you don't know what to buy your husband for Christmas, googling "Gifts for My Husband?" probably won't help.

Here's another tip: Don't buy a necktie. media: 21231090

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Apparently, all it took was the love of a small boy and a cartoon time machine. media:21003454

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