Working Wounded: Handing A Transition
— -- Dear Readers: Transition — these days it's part of everyone's job, and personal life. William Bridges wrote the book on transition; actually he's written a whole library (The Way of Transition, Transitions and Managing Transitions). Bill is also a consultant and lecturer.
— A Reluctant Hatfield-->
Working Wounded: Recently I went through a very traumatic personal transition. I came across your book in Mexico and found it remarkably insightful. What are the key things you've learned in the 30 years you've studied transitions?
William Bridges: We live in a society where the pace of change undermines any status quo we can reach. We think we can "manage change;" that is a defensive and ultimately self-defeating process. The way to deal with change is to understand the three-phase transition process that it triggers. The first phase is an ending. Ask yourself, "What is it time for me to let go of?" The answer to that question isn't "my job," if you've just lost one. What you have to let go of is the way of getting needs met or things accomplished that your job gave you. Or it is the way the job made you feel or the assumptions about yourself that the job encouraged. Start by letting go, which involves more than just feeling sad.
Working Wounded: From your experience, what is the biggest surprise for a person suddenly faced with a major transition?
William Bridges: People seldom expect that "good" changes — a promotion, a marriage, etc. — are going to feel like they contain hidden losses. But that is because, although a "change" can start with a new situation, the "transition" that it triggers must start with an ending.
Working Wounded: How did you get started in this area?
William Bridges: I made a career change and a relocation at the age of forty and expected my life to move ahead positively, only to find that I was bogged down in the ending and the neutral zone (the stage in-between the ending that triggers the transition and the new beginning that follows it). Learning to get myself through it was the start of helping others.
Working Wounded: Much of your work today is with organizations. What has this experience taught you?
William Bridges: An organizational change puts everyone into transition, but organizational leaders have no patience for it. So they rush people … only to find out that they haven't let go. Then they decide that they did the first change wrong and try another … and then another. People finally wear out.
Working Wounded: What about life after a transition?
William Bridges: When I first wrote about transition, I thought it was just the way you reoriented yourself to let go of the old way and to embrace the new way. But in the past decade — triggered partly by the death of my first wife five years ago — I have learned that it is also the way that you revitalize and renew yourself. Properly handled, transition brings new energy and a new sense of purpose into your life. That's true even for someone like me — I'm 68.
We'd like to hear your strategy for surviving a difficult transition. I'll give an autographed copy of Working Wounded: Advice That Adds Insight to Injury (Warner, 2000) to the best entry, plus I'll write you a memo — to your boss, to a co-worker who's bugging you — that's sure to get attention. Send your entry, name and address via: http://workingwounded.com, email: bob@workingwounded.com, or fax: (206) 780-4353. Entries must be received by Wednesday, June 26.
Online Ballot and Contest
Here are the results from a recent workingwounded.com/ABCNEWS.com online ballot: Which best sums up your feelings?
Employees can do no wrong — 3.2 percent. Employers can do no wrong — 6.7 percent. Everybody screws up — 90 percent.
Winning Strategy
The previous column — which consisted of an email from the boss of a trucking company about a former employee who left and took company secrets — generated a ton of mail. It was almost evenly divided between people who felt that the employee was a thief and broke the law. They chided me for even raising the issue because the facts of the case were so clear-cut in favor of the company.
The other half of my mail came from people who criticized me from the other direction — saying that whatever an employee can get from an employer is fine, because the company would rip them off in a minute. Needless to say the question — Why can't we all just get along? — is as timely as ever for today's workplace.
List of the Week
Bob Rosner is the author of the Wall Street Journal business best seller, The Boss's Survival Guide (McGraw Hill, 2001), a speaker, and founder of the award-winning workingwounded.com & RetentionEvangelist.com. E-mail him at bob@RetentionEvangelist.com.
ABCNEWS.com publishes a new Working Wounded column every Friday.
Working Wounded: From your experience, what is the biggest surprise for a person suddenly faced with a major transition?
William Bridges: People seldom expect that "good" changes — a promotion, a marriage, etc. — are going to feel like they contain hidden losses. But that is because, although a "change" can start with a new situation, the "transition" that it triggers must start with an ending.
Working Wounded: How did you get started in this area?
William Bridges: I made a career change and a relocation at the age of forty and expected my life to move ahead positively, only to find that I was bogged down in the ending and the neutral zone (the stage in-between the ending that triggers the transition and the new beginning that follows it). Learning to get myself through it was the start of helping others.
Working Wounded: Much of your work today is with organizations. What has this experience taught you?
William Bridges: An organizational change puts everyone into transition, but organizational leaders have no patience for it. So they rush people … only to find out that they haven't let go. Then they decide that they did the first change wrong and try another … and then another. People finally wear out.
Working Wounded: What about life after a transition?
William Bridges: When I first wrote about transition, I thought it was just the way you reoriented yourself to let go of the old way and to embrace the new way. But in the past decade — triggered partly by the death of my first wife five years ago — I have learned that it is also the way that you revitalize and renew yourself. Properly handled, transition brings new energy and a new sense of purpose into your life. That's true even for someone like me — I'm 68.
We'd like to hear your strategy for surviving a difficult transition. I'll give an autographed copy of Working Wounded: Advice That Adds Insight to Injury (Warner, 2000) to the best entry, plus I'll write you a memo — to your boss, to a co-worker who's bugging you — that's sure to get attention. Send your entry, name and address via: http://workingwounded.com, email: bob@workingwounded.com, or fax: (206) 780-4353. Entries must be received by Wednesday, June 26.
Online Ballot and Contest
Here are the results from a recent workingwounded.com/ABCNEWS.com online ballot: Which best sums up your feelings?
Employees can do no wrong — 3.2 percent. Employers can do no wrong — 6.7 percent. Everybody screws up — 90 percent.
Winning Strategy
The previous column — which consisted of an email from the boss of a trucking company about a former employee who left and took company secrets — generated a ton of mail. It was almost evenly divided between people who felt that the employee was a thief and broke the law. They chided me for even raising the issue because the facts of the case were so clear-cut in favor of the company.
The other half of my mail came from people who criticized me from the other direction — saying that whatever an employee can get from an employer is fine, because the company would rip them off in a minute. Needless to say the question — Why can't we all just get along? — is as timely as ever for today's workplace.
List of the Week
Bob Rosner is the author of the Wall Street Journal business best seller, The Boss's Survival Guide (McGraw Hill, 2001), a speaker, and founder of the award-winning workingwounded.com & RetentionEvangelist.com. E-mail him at bob@RetentionEvangelist.com.
ABCNEWS.com publishes a new Working Wounded column every Friday.
Working Wounded: From your experience, what is the biggest surprise for a person suddenly faced with a major transition?
William Bridges: People seldom expect that "good" changes — a promotion, a marriage, etc. — are going to feel like they contain hidden losses. But that is because, although a "change" can start with a new situation, the "transition" that it triggers must start with an ending.
Working Wounded: How did you get started in this area?
William Bridges: I made a career change and a relocation at the age of forty and expected my life to move ahead positively, only to find that I was bogged down in the ending and the neutral zone (the stage in-between the ending that triggers the transition and the new beginning that follows it). Learning to get myself through it was the start of helping others.
Working Wounded: Much of your work today is with organizations. What has this experience taught you?
William Bridges: An organizational change puts everyone into transition, but organizational leaders have no patience for it. So they rush people … only to find out that they haven't let go. Then they decide that they did the first change wrong and try another … and then another. People finally wear out.
Working Wounded: What about life after a transition?
William Bridges: When I first wrote about transition, I thought it was just the way you reoriented yourself to let go of the old way and to embrace the new way. But in the past decade — triggered partly by the death of my first wife five years ago — I have learned that it is also the way that you revitalize and renew yourself. Properly handled, transition brings new energy and a new sense of purpose into your life. That's true even for someone like me — I'm 68.
We'd like to hear your strategy for surviving a difficult transition. I'll give an autographed copy of Working Wounded: Advice That Adds Insight to Injury (Warner, 2000) to the best entry, plus I'll write you a memo — to your boss, to a co-worker who's bugging you — that's sure to get attention. Send your entry, name and address via: http://workingwounded.com, email: bob@workingwounded.com, or fax: (206) 780-4353. Entries must be received by Wednesday, June 26.
Online Ballot and Contest
Here are the results from a recent workingwounded.com/ABCNEWS.com online ballot: Which best sums up your feelings?
Employees can do no wrong — 3.2 percent. Employers can do no wrong — 6.7 percent. Everybody screws up — 90 percent.
Winning Strategy
The previous column — which consisted of an email from the boss of a trucking company about a former employee who left and took company secrets — generated a ton of mail. It was almost evenly divided between people who felt that the employee was a thief and broke the law. They chided me for even raising the issue because the facts of the case were so clear-cut in favor of the company.
The other half of my mail came from people who criticized me from the other direction — saying that whatever an employee can get from an employer is fine, because the company would rip them off in a minute. Needless to say the question — Why can't we all just get along? — is as timely as ever for today's workplace.
List of the Week
Bob Rosner is the author of the Wall Street Journal business best seller, The Boss's Survival Guide (McGraw Hill, 2001), a speaker, and founder of the award-winning workingwounded.com & RetentionEvangelist.com. E-mail him at bob@RetentionEvangelist.com.
ABCNEWS.com publishes a new Working Wounded column every Friday.
Working Wounded: How did you get started in this area?
William Bridges: I made a career change and a relocation at the age of forty and expected my life to move ahead positively, only to find that I was bogged down in the ending and the neutral zone (the stage in-between the ending that triggers the transition and the new beginning that follows it). Learning to get myself through it was the start of helping others.
Working Wounded: Much of your work today is with organizations. What has this experience taught you?
William Bridges: An organizational change puts everyone into transition, but organizational leaders have no patience for it. So they rush people … only to find out that they haven't let go. Then they decide that they did the first change wrong and try another … and then another. People finally wear out.
Working Wounded: What about life after a transition?
William Bridges: When I first wrote about transition, I thought it was just the way you reoriented yourself to let go of the old way and to embrace the new way. But in the past decade — triggered partly by the death of my first wife five years ago — I have learned that it is also the way that you revitalize and renew yourself. Properly handled, transition brings new energy and a new sense of purpose into your life. That's true even for someone like me — I'm 68.
We'd like to hear your strategy for surviving a difficult transition. I'll give an autographed copy of Working Wounded: Advice That Adds Insight to Injury (Warner, 2000) to the best entry, plus I'll write you a memo — to your boss, to a co-worker who's bugging you — that's sure to get attention. Send your entry, name and address via: http://workingwounded.com, email: bob@workingwounded.com, or fax: (206) 780-4353. Entries must be received by Wednesday, June 26.
Online Ballot and Contest
Here are the results from a recent workingwounded.com/ABCNEWS.com online ballot: Which best sums up your feelings?
Employees can do no wrong — 3.2 percent. Employers can do no wrong — 6.7 percent. Everybody screws up — 90 percent.
Winning Strategy
The previous column — which consisted of an email from the boss of a trucking company about a former employee who left and took company secrets — generated a ton of mail. It was almost evenly divided between people who felt that the employee was a thief and broke the law. They chided me for even raising the issue because the facts of the case were so clear-cut in favor of the company.
The other half of my mail came from people who criticized me from the other direction — saying that whatever an employee can get from an employer is fine, because the company would rip them off in a minute. Needless to say the question — Why can't we all just get along? — is as timely as ever for today's workplace.
List of the Week
Bob Rosner is the author of the Wall Street Journal business best seller, The Boss's Survival Guide (McGraw Hill, 2001), a speaker, and founder of the award-winning workingwounded.com & RetentionEvangelist.com. E-mail him at bob@RetentionEvangelist.com.
ABCNEWS.com publishes a new Working Wounded column every Friday.
We'd like to hear your strategy for surviving a difficult transition. I'll give an autographed copy of Working Wounded: Advice That Adds Insight to Injury (Warner, 2000) to the best entry, plus I'll write you a memo — to your boss, to a co-worker who's bugging you — that's sure to get attention. Send your entry, name and address via: http://workingwounded.com, email: bob@workingwounded.com, or fax: (206) 780-4353. Entries must be received by Wednesday, June 26.
Online Ballot and Contest
Here are the results from a recent workingwounded.com/ABCNEWS.com online ballot: Which best sums up your feelings?
Employees can do no wrong — 3.2 percent. Employers can do no wrong — 6.7 percent. Everybody screws up — 90 percent.
Winning Strategy
The previous column — which consisted of an email from the boss of a trucking company about a former employee who left and took company secrets — generated a ton of mail. It was almost evenly divided between people who felt that the employee was a thief and broke the law. They chided me for even raising the issue because the facts of the case were so clear-cut in favor of the company.
The other half of my mail came from people who criticized me from the other direction — saying that whatever an employee can get from an employer is fine, because the company would rip them off in a minute. Needless to say the question — Why can't we all just get along? — is as timely as ever for today's workplace.
List of the Week
Bob Rosner is the author of the Wall Street Journal business best seller, The Boss's Survival Guide (McGraw Hill, 2001), a speaker, and founder of the award-winning workingwounded.com & RetentionEvangelist.com. E-mail him at bob@RetentionEvangelist.com.
ABCNEWS.com publishes a new Working Wounded column every Friday.
List of the Week
Bob Rosner is the author of the Wall Street Journal business best seller, The Boss's Survival Guide (McGraw Hill, 2001), a speaker, and founder of the award-winning workingwounded.com & RetentionEvangelist.com. E-mail him at bob@RetentionEvangelist.com.
ABCNEWS.com publishes a new Working Wounded column every Friday.