Bad Airplane Food and Web Obsessions

Oct. 15, 2002 -- -- Some people still wonder who really shot John F. Kennedy, and other people wonder why their father is slowly turning into a clone of Kenny Rogers.

No matter how wacky the conspiracy theory, you've got a friend on the Internet. In fact, you've got a disturbing number of like-minded friends.

This week The Wolf Files looks at Web sites that cater to mundane obsessions. Why is airline food so bad? When will Julia Roberts change lovers? How can I get my phone to play Eminem's latest hit when it rings?

The answers to these questions might be inconsequential — but not when you need a little help procrastinating.

1. Pointless Click Counter:

If you're looking for the biggest waste of time on the Internet, it'd be hard to top Ben Charlton's "Pointless Click Counter" (http://spod.cx/pcc/) — a Web site that does nothing more than log how many times Net heads will click on a button that does absolutely nothing.

More than a million people clicked on Charlton's pointless click counter back in July, less than a month after the British university student set it up.

Charlton made the media rounds, saying he found the overwhelming results rather disturbing, and briefly took down the site, leaving thousands feeling even more pointless.

Now, if you keep clicking, you might have the honor of being the 1.5 millionth clicker.

2. Flights of Passion: Here's cold comfort for anyone who thinks they've had the worst airline meal — pictures of nearly 800 meals from 130 airlines.

On his way from the Netherlands to Turkey last year, Marco Hart had such a bad meal, he had to photograph it — or his friends wouldn't believe him.

"Once I put it on the Web, the collection took on a life of its own," said the 32-year-old Web designer. "Everyone has a story about an airline meal."

Now, Hart's Web site (www.airlinemeals.net) is now a magnet for flying foodies.

The message boards are rife with airline food news, posted by air travelers. Hart says Cathay Pacific offers some of the best airline food, but Egypt Air is the worst. "If you saw what the potatoes looked like — little fingers," he says.

If you have other air-travel obsessions, Harts offers links to sites that celebrate flight attendant uniforms and airsickness bags. 3. Designer Telephone Rings:

Can't get enough Eminem on the radio? The potty-mouthed rapper is now topping also topping the charts in cell phone ring tones.

Perhaps the theme from The Simpsons or the "Imperial March" from Star Wars is more your style.

"Your cell phone ring should reflect who you are," says Brian Casazza of RingtoneJukebox.com, who claims that designer jingles are trendy in Britain and the Netherlands.

Now, there's a whole new Internet diversion — deciding which telephone ring best defines who you are.

Perhaps that would be Jay Z's "Big Pimpin'," or Alien Ant Farm's "Smooth Criminal." Either way, Pavlov's dog would be drooling proudly.

4. Catch a Falling Star:

If you are certain that Julia Roberts' marriage will end soon, don't wait to say, "I told you so."

The Starsinlove.com Web site — launched to poke fun at Roberts' Fourth of July wedding to cameraman Daniel Moder — now runs ongoing opinion polls of celebrity matrimony.

Which famous couple will throw in the towel next? Here's the latest:

• 40 percent of respondents says Lisa Marie Presley and Nicolas Cage, married Aug. 13, will be divorced before their 10-month anniversary.

• About 65 percent say Roberts' marriage will be over within 18 months.

• Nearly 50 percent say Paul McCartney's marriage to Heather Mills will last.

"The way I look at it, so many celebrity marriages are just publicity stunts," says Richard Adams, who peddles such items as a gaseous Santa at PullMyFinger.com.

5. Jolly Rogers: If you thought there were a disturbing amount of Elvis impersonators, you should see all the silver-haired devils who resemble country star Kenny Rogers.

Menwholooklikekenny.com boasts some 700 Kenny Clones, including "Trekkie Kenny" and "Hot Tub Kenny."

"I saw a guy at a mall who looked like Kenny Rogers. It seemed like a funny idea for an art project," says Jaimie Meuhlhausen, a 41-year-old graphic designer from San Diego.

But what started as a joke is now a minor sensation, reportedly generating about $500 a month in T-shirt and souvenir revenue.

Topping it off, the Kenny Rogers' look-alike site is now a quiz question in the latest edition of Trivial Pursuit.

"I think it's hilarious," Rogers, 64, told People magazine a few weeks ago. "I realized years ago there seem to be a lot of people who look like me. Whenever I looked down into the audience, there'd be four or five guys."

Rogers, famous for his hit "The Gambler," even worked out a small licensing agreement "just to make us legit" says Meuhlhausen, who offers step-by-step instructions for imitating the country legend.

Applicants hoping for status as a "Kenny Rogers of the Month" should certainly know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em, know when to walk away, and (most definitely) know when to run.

Answer to quiz: All these men may look like Kenny Rogers. None of them is the real thing.

Buck Wolf is entertainment producerat ABCNEWS.com. The Wolf Files ispublished Tuesdays. If you want to receive weekly notice whena new column is published, join the e-maillist.