Inside the Mind of 'The Bachelorette'

March 5, 2004 -- When it comes to couples, some — like The Bachelorette's Meredith Phillips, 30, and Ian McKee, 29 — are simply meant to be. Two years before she appeared in ABC's hit reality series, Phillips was a model in New York City's East Village.

Little did she know, her soul mate was practically outside her door. "We lived across the street from each other!" says McKee. And the bar he took her to on their Big Apple trip, Industry? "It was the first bar I ever went to [when I lived] in Manhattan — and it became my favorite," she tells Us.

"We went there because it was his favorite."

The coincidences don't end there. Their favorite book: The Alchemist, by Paulo Coelho. Their footwear: "I wear these Brazilian sandals, called Havaianas," says Sao Paolo-bred McKee. "Without knowing it, she wore the same pair on our date in Puerto Rico."

If you looked closely, McKee says, "There were little signs."

Now, on February 27, two days after 15 million viewers watched McKee accept his final rose boutonniere, the ultimate symbol of their destiny — a 3-carat-plus engagement ring — is in plain sight. "It's been a long time coming," Phillips says. ‘I Love How Affectionate He Is’

At the Us photo shoot in Beverly Hills, they can't stop touching and sharing small kisses. "I love how affectionate he is," Phillips says. When he strolls by in a T-shirt that showcases his muscular arms, she tells him, "Honey, we're going to have to buy you a few of those."

So how is it that, in an ABC poll, nearly 80 percent of the show's fans predicted she would pick sweet, ready-to-wed Texan Matthew Hickl, 28, over former investment banker McKee, who swore all along he wouldn't propose? Careful editing ("The best parts of our relationship were never shown," complains McKee), with the inclusion of Phillips's confession to Hickl: "I would be honored if it ended with a ring."

Phillips tried to explain the misleading statement on the February 26 live After the Final Rose special, saying she was trying to gauge his emotions, but the next day she's still feeling guilty.

"I don't know how to fix it," she confesses. "It's not something that's fixable — I just fell in love with someone else."

The passion she feels with McKee, she says, just wasn't present with Hickl. McKee, too, is doing damage control. On the same special, he told host Chris Harrison he had never been in love before — which may have shocked the woman he dated for six years (they even lived together before splitting in 2000).

"I don't think she'll forgive me," McKee says. "I probably ripped her heart out of her body."

What McKee meant was that he had never used those three little words. A Shoo-In

Truth be told, the six-foot-one McKee — who was born in Brazil and speaks Portuguese and Spanish — had her at hola.

"Meredith set her sights on Ian from the beginning," says co-executive producer Lisa Levenson, who recalls watching the pair stare into each other's eyes.

"They had this unspoken chemistry which excited her," says Levenson, "and annoyed the hell out of me."

On their first solo date, the two shared a rickshaw ride — and their first kiss. "We just couldn't hold back anymore," says McKee, who knew she was the one then and there. She was falling too.

"He stood out the first night," Phillips says. "But after our date in Chinatown [on Episode 3], I thought, Boy, oh, boy."

Even some tense moments in New York City with McKee's skeptical brother Eric, 27, didn't shatter the bond. "It was interesting to see him gaga over a girl because he's basically been able to have anyone he's ever wanted," says Eric, a financial research analyst.

So why did he make his brother promise not to propose? "To bring down his expectations in case she threw him out on his butt!" Eric says.

Not likely — their differences are minor: She's neat, he's not. She likes the Food Network, he prefers Seinfeld. She's into Sarah McLachlan, he rocks out to U2. In terms of the big picture, "They are really in tune with each other," Phillips's brother, Matt, 33, a Nike exec, tells Us.

When the two visited her family in Portland, Oregon (mom Sandy is a realtor; dad Ed is a financial adviser), Matt says, "They could finish each other's sentences."

During their two-month separation, "Lois" and "Clark" (code names given by the show) telephoned daily and got together twice a month. That time reassured Phillips that her choice was right. "I can be truly, 100 percent comfortable around him," she says. "He doesn't judge. That's one of the things I love best." The Right Moment for HerDuring a car ride to the E! studios, McKee did have a comment on Phillips's speaking habits. "I think you said 'you know' three times in one sentence," he told her. She just shrugged it off — talk about true love!

So, where to go with all this compatibility? Phillips insists, "I just wanted to be with Ian. It wasn't about a ring." And yet, in a way it was, because his unexpected, abbreviated proposal — "Will you?" — made for, dare we say, the most shocking rose ceremony ever.

McKee tells Us he didn't know he was going to pop the question until seconds beforehand. It was "the right moment for her. I don't think she would have ever forgiven me if I hadn't [done it]."

What's next? McKee, who left Wall Street 14 months ago to travel (he used his savings to visit Eastern Europe, Turkey and Central America), is planning to move to the West Coast. He and fiancée Phillips, who currently shares a West Hollywood apartment with a girlfriend, are talking about San Diego — although a recent trip to New York City had them considering that as well. "We have a lot to learn about each other," he says, "and I think that's how we're going to find out about it all."

Looking for work isn't a priority just yet. "We want to travel," says Phillips, who hopes to attend culinary school and continue modeling, "so it's gonna be a little while."

On the itinerary: Brazil (courtesy of ABC), Paris, Thailand and, most important, Florida, to see his father, a retired investment banker, and stepmother (McKee's mother died when he was 3). So, when's the wedding?

"Probably within a year we'll have a date," says McKee.

Echoes Phillips, "We're not going to rush it."

And don't even ask about a TV ceremony. "No way," he says. As it is, the odds are against longevity.

Out of The Bachelor and Bachelorette's five previous couples, only Trista and Ryan are still together. "Neither one of us is interested in anything besides what we found in each other," Phillips says emphatically.

In other words, these two are concentrating on their love, not the limelight. "We don't want to be celebrities," she says. "We want to go on adventures, start our own lives." Adds her future husband, "I think that the way we came together, all we have, looking forward, is wonderful."

Reporting by Tina Dirmann & Amy Sultan in L.A.; Lara Cohen, Jessica Mehalic, Ingela Ratledge & Mara Reinstein in NYC