Steve Harvey: Don't Be Stupid About Men
Comedian shares controversial relationship advice for women in new best-seller.
April 7, 2009 -- Comedian Steve Harvey creates a stir everywhere he goes these days. Women won't let him walk down the street, and they're lining up for hours to see him.
Harvey, best known as one of the Kings of Comedy, is now, officially, the "King of Relationships."
His self-help book, "Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man," has sold more than 1 million copies and spent nine weeks atop the New York Times best-seller list.
So what makes the 53-year-old comedian who has been married three times a relationship expert?
"I'm not a relationship expert," he told "Nightline." "I'm an expert on manhood."
Harvey's insight into men is the reason women can't put the book down.
"How hot is this book? It's really hot," said one woman. "A lot of women are going through stressful relationships and they want to know why. He gives a key and opens up the world to the way men are thinking."
90-Day Probation Period
Harvey's been giving relationship advice for years. On his morning radio show, Harvey has a regular segment called Strawberry Letter in which listeners, mostly women, write in for advice.
Harvey's answers are often funny, and never sugar-coated.
"Get it through your head, you are the Friday girl," he told one caller on his show. "That is just for sex. That's what you are. He's not going to graduate you to his wife. We don't upgrade sex girls, we don't do that. We don't do that."
And to that end, Harvey says no woman should, in his words, "give up the cookie" for 90 days.
"No, it's too long... to wait," said one of the few men spotted at a recent book signing in Philadelphia.
But Harvey is sticking to that mantra.
"When I worked at Ford Motor Company, they have a probation period. You have to be on the job 90 days in order for Ford Motor Company to release their benefit package to you," he explained. "Why do women, who possess the greatest benefit of them all, why you passing on your benefits to a guy who has not been on the job for 90 days and has not proven to you that he's worthy of a benefit package?"
'How Can Smart Women Be So Stupid About Men?'
Women have taken the 90-day advice to heart.
"I think you need to wait longer than that," said Daisy Smith, another woman at the book signing. "Sometimes you give up the cookies and it just doesn't work. And once you give up the cookie you can't get it back!"
"I'd like to thank you, Steve, because I wish I had this book a couple years ago," another woman told Harvey at the signing. "A lot of things would have went differently."
"You're two successful women," Harvey told them. "You have good jobs. How can smart women be so stupid about men sometimes? Lack of knowledge. It's what men have kept secret for so long."
What other secrets is Harvey spilling? He says a man that sends you a text message doesn't really care.
"A guy that's really serious about you, he's gotta be talking to you, he's gotta want to have one-on-one, in-your-face interaction," he said. "That's how we are."
"The guy who is just texting, that's no effort. He doesn't have to get in the car, he doesn't have to remember your number, he doesn't have to spend time... There's no effort in texting."
It is clear Harvey loves women. But one might have not have guessed the comedian would be the voice to convince women to love and respect themselves.
"Women are the real reason we get up every day," said Harvey. "I'm talking about real men. If there were no women, I would not even have to bathe, because why would I care? These are guys I'm hanging with. I wake up for a woman every day of my life to make it happen for her."