Time Troubles: Romance Brigade to the Rescue

Feb. 12, 2007 — -- Tara and Josh Himes, a Salem, Ohio, couple, are high school sweethearts who have been married for three years. These days they are practically living separate lives.

The Himes' hectic schedule begins bright and early at 5 a.m. when Josh gets up and heads out to work, racking up miles and delivering packages.

An hour and a half later, Tara is up and off to Springfield Intermediate School, where she teaches English and coaches the cheerleading squad in the afternoon.

Working on her master's degree, Tara also takes evening college courses twice a week and leaves Josh to eat by himself and go to bed alone four, sometimes five, days a week.

"Good Morning America" sent its "romance brigade" of Men's Health editor Matt Bean and Women's Health Deputy Editor Nicole Beland to help the couple out.

Romance Rescue

"We might see each other for five to 10 minutes in the morning," Tara told Bean and Beland.

"Maybe 20 minutes -- half hour at night and that's the extent of it," Josh said.

Tara, for one, believes talking a little bit more could bring the couple closer together and make the relationship more romantic.

"I wish I could talk a little bit more," she said. "I think we've gotten so much into our rut that you know, 'How was your day?' … It's just kind of hard to step out of that a little bit."

Many of the nights they do have together are spent exhausted, eating dinner and zoning out in front of the TV.

Their weekends are filled with family functions, time with friends and non-stop chores.

"I'm so busy during the week that all my weekends I just want to chill and relax," Tara said. "But he's the opposite where he sits at home waiting for me to get home all week long and he wants to go do things."

So how does a couple on opposite schedules squeeze in time for romance?

Massage

Beland suggested that the couple come to the bedroom with the direct intention of paying attention to each another instead of watching TV. To do that, she told the couple to try massage.

According to a recent survey, 53 percent of women say that a back rub or a foot massage is the best way to get them in the mood.

The romance brigade recommended incorporating massage oils or any hand-held massage tools into the experience.

Use Video Phones

Josh told Bean and Beland that being able to check in with his wife helped him deal with spending so much time apart. To enhance that experience, Bean suggested investing in a video phone so that the couple could send each other video clips throughout the day.

The romance brigade recommends AT&T/Cingular video phones.

Leave Love Notes

Tara thought it was romantic when she and Josh used to leave each other notes. Beland suggested that she leave her husband messages on the bathroom mirror so he could think about her all day.

Schedule Time Together

One of the most important things, Bean told the couple, is for the pair to make the most of the time that they do have together. To do that, once a month they should head out of town for a change of scenery with no family, just each other. The couple should also do something alone once a week.

For ideas, check out Fodor's books for your home state or nearest city. They'll give you great ideas for restaurants, sites and events.