Working Moms Counter Study Claiming Their Kids Are Unhealthy

Oct. 17, 2009— -- After examining 12,572 five-year-old British kids, the Institute of Child Health found three major bad habits among children of working moms: They drink more sugary beverages between meals, watch TV or use the computer at least two hours a day and they get less exercise.

The study seems to confirm many working moms' worst fears, sparking controversy and heated debates in the never-ending mommy wars.

ABC News correspondent JuJu Chang, a working mother of three boys ages 9, 6 and 2, sat down with a panel of four working mothers.

Meet the Moms

Margarita Miranda-Abate, 41, a public relations manager with a 5-year-old boy.

Sherrie Matusz, 37, a media relations executive with four children all under the age of 7.

Lamonia Brown, 40, a single mom and an event planner with two grown kids and a 12-year-old.

Sarah Welch, 37, a business owner with a 3-year-old boy and an infant.

JUJU CHANG: I think this report sort of confirms what every working mom fears, right? Secret fear is, "Oh, my kids would be better off if I were at home."

MARGARITA MIRANDA-ABATE: You know, my first reaction was, "Why do we need to even go there?" I mean, why do we need to pit working moms against stay-at-home moms? That was my first thought. Because at this point, we should be beyond that. Either we have a choice or some women don't have a choice to work.

SARAH WELCH: My first reaction was [that] it tripped every guilt trigger that I have. I think the headline was something like, "Working mothers' children unfit." I was like, "Did I just read 'Working mothers unfit?' Working mothers unfit for children?" Then I was, sort of, "Oh, my God, am I hurting my child by choosing to work?"

SHERRIE MATUSZ: You don't need to be with your kids every minute for them to be healthy and happy.

LAMONIA BROWN: OK, here we go again. You got another thing that working mothers do to harm their kids. Please give me a break. I wanted to see: OK, where did this data come from? What are they basing this on? There are so many things that make kids unhealthy, it cannot possibly be that I go to work.

CHANG: This study doesn't say the kids are unhealthy; it highlights specific unhealthy habits that can promote weight gain. The data is based on working mothers' self-reporting, and dads are not included in the study.

MIRANDA-ABATE: I think the biggest pitfall for working moms, or for any parents, in keeping them healthy, is just time. I do the best I can. I'm a very involved parent.

WELCH: If I don't plan ahead and have sort of a healthy snack on hand, our default is gonna be something less healthy -- cracker or cookie. ... So, one of the things I do Sunday nights ... after everybody is asleep, I have some quiet time, I'll chop up some carrots, peppers and cucumbers.

MIRANDA-ABATE: I involve my son in every choice. If we're gonna choose a snack: "Well, what snack are you gonna choose? No, you can't have that cookie, let me tell you why. You just had a cookie yesterday."

CHANG: What about making sure your kids have rules about screen time? I mean, my kid, left to his own devices, will be suction cupped to the TV set. How do you limit that?

MATUSZ: I offer lots of different activities that they can do. We have a trampoline in our backyard, and we thought this would get them off their feet, get outside, play with each other and get some activity -- and also burn off all the energy that we want them to right before bed. And if they're all sitting there watching TV and you realize, OK, an hour has passed. What are we gonna do? All right, dance party in the trampoline! You have to get them all excited.

BROWN: There are tons of activities that you can enroll your children in, whether it's music class, or have them on different types of teams or free museums on weekends. My son goes to school until five in the evening, anyway. Then, some of those nights he has a soccer game. He goes to school on Saturdays, and he has music lessons. You may be at home, but make sure they're just not sitting at home. You know?

CHANG: Keep them busy.

BROWN: Keep them busy.

MATUSZ: All of my kids do at least two sports, plus other activities.

CHANG:Right, but who shuttles them to all these things?

MATUSZ: Mostly me, but I do have help.

CHANG: But a lot of women don't. They have to put their kid in day care. Or they stick them with a neighbor who's not gonna play with them in the way that they're gonna play with them.

MATUSZ: You have to be careful.

BROWN: You just have to be careful about who that neighbor is, what that day care center is, make sure they have activities for the kids, not just plopping the kids in front of TVs and videos and Xboxes, that type of thing. Do your due diligence. You have to do research. I was fortunate enough with my older two kids that my grandmother took care of them. And she was definitely not gonna have them sitting in front of the TV all the time. And I was fortunate enough to be raised by our mother who has formed winning habits in us. She developed a habit in me of not eating junk food, not eating ice cream and cakes all the time. When my kids came along, we're eating fruit, we're eating fresh vegetables.

CHANG: OK, we're eating junk. So I can come clean. OK, you can have some more gummy bears. I'm a terribly mother, clearly.

[Everybody laughs]

BROWN: No, no, no.

CHANG: But modeling is very important. I mean, what are the behaviors you model for your kids? Knowingly or unknowingly, that promotes a healthy lifestyle, yeah?

BROWN: Right.

CHANG: All right. Sarah touched on it a little bit. But I want to touch on it with each of you, is the guilt. Because that's basically what, you know, from a mother's perspective, what this left me with. I was, like, gnashing of teeth and questioning of my entire life, right? I mean, working mothers, as you say, is not easy.

MATUSZ: No, it's not. There's a lot of judgment. You feel bad enough when you're at the computer and behind is your son saying, "Watch me do magic tricks." You're like, "One minute, one minute, one minute. Do your magic trick." Even though I'm home working, I do lots of things with them.

MIRANDA-ABATE: I know how I'm wired. I'm a better mother because I work. I'm more attentive. I'm just calmer. I'm more patient. My career is an important part of who defines me. Being a mother is not the only piece, that's a big important piece. But eventually, my son's gonna grow up.

BROWN: It's important for your kids to actually see you being a productive member of society. I mean, we're our children's first role models.

WELCH: My mom worked. In moments where I have that extreme mom guilt and thinking, "Oh, my god, what am I doing? I'm harming my kids." I try to take a step back, look at myself. Did I turn out horribly? No. My mom is one of my closest friends.