Over 40 and Still Fabulous

Oct. 3, 2006 — -- With women like Christie Brinkley and Iman looking fabulous in their 50s, it's clear that middle age isn't what it used to be.

But since most American women aren't supermodels, how do they deal with aging?

Gayle King, "Good Morning America's" special contributor and editor at large of O, the Oprah Magazine, sat down with three women in their 40s and 50s for a discussion about how real women feel about arriving at middle age.

"I'm starting to wonder, guys, if there's something wrong with me because I'm 51, and, honestly, I don't even feel 40," King said.

Judy Mills-Johnson, 52, assured King that the transition to middle age was subtle.

"It's not an 'aha' moment, where suddenly you think, 'Oh, I'm there,'" Mills-Johnson said. "I know when I was 40, I began to care less about what other people thought about me. … It was more, 'This is my life.'"

King asked the women whether they felt middle-aged.

"Oh, I hate that word," said Margaretta Morman, 46.

Danielle Sevier, 41, agreed. Still, some of the women shared age-related regrets.

"I regret I don't have any children," Morman said. "I still have something going -- of hope. But at the same time, I'm realistic, saying to myself [that] the opportunity might have passed me, and I -- I'm becoming better with being OK with that."

Bad Knees, High Spirits

When it came to their bodies, all the women said they were surprised to find they couldn't always move they way they once did.

"How are we doing, girls, with our bodies? I can sit here and say, you know, I don't quite feel 40 yet, but my knees will tell you a very different story," King said.

"Your body does things that you didn't authorize it to do," Mills-Johnson said. "And that's the part where you think, 'Wait a minute, you know, this -- I have a little arthritis in my feet."

Sevier said the best way to deal with physical changes was to take everything in stride.

"But it's a matter of accepting. I mean the changes started two years ago, and I found myself -- I'd always preach, 'Oh, I'm gonna do plastic surgery. I'm just gonna take care of myself.' But when the changes actually started to happen, I was like, 'Oh, my gosh,'" Sevier said.

Like Sevier, Mills-Johnson and Morman found plastic surgery a not-so-appealing option.

"I think society kind of makes us feel [like we need surgery.] And that it's a taboo to age with the body we came into this world with, you know," Morman said.

Acceptance Is the Key

When asked whether women could age gracefully, Mills-Johnson and Morman said yes.

"Absolutely. Absolutely. But the key of aging gracefully is just loving who you are every step of the way, no matter what," Morman said.

Mills-Johnson said looking older wasn't her biggest fear. She suspects many women worry about more important problems, like their health.

"I don't think it's aging that frightens us," she said. "I think disease frightens us. Ill health frightens us. Being a poor, older person frightens us because that looks very real and very scary."

All agreed that acceptance was key.

"You know, I don't like getting older but I'm learning to accept things, what I cannot change and to just say OK, this is it," Sevier said.

For Mills-Johnson, middle age is treating her better than her younger years.

"I think I like me better now than I liked me in my 20s," she said. "And so that makes life a happier experience."

In the end, the conclusion the women came to wasn't a bad one at all.

"Maybe we should just face it, guys. We're just all so fabulous," King said.