New Service Offers to Put Messages in Bottles for $39.90

Wannabe castaway, take note!

— -- Given the inescapable popularity of Instagram, Facebook and Twitter, it's easy to get nostalgic for more old-fashioned modes of communication: thank-you notes, love letters, slips of paper passed in high school geometry class.

At least one company in Germany is eager to turn back the clock.

Earlier this week, Message from a Bottle launched a new service that hopes to revive a lost art.

According to its website, the company offers wannabe castaways the opportunity to send "a message in a bottle. Almost like you know it from novels or movies. But even better:" Message from a Bottle is not in fact as low-tech as it seems. The company uses a sophisticated navigation system to track the bottles it releases "west of Ireland. Where the current is particularly advantageous."

"You will always keep track of your bottle," reads a message on its homepage. "By a GPS signal you get for up to one year."

Right.

On the one hand, "always" is generally understood to mean a period of time longer than "one year". But then again, 365 days are at least a version of eternity to wait for a letter to arrive.

Should you decide to purchase a branded bottle, know this -- the simple pleasure does not come cheap.

A "Standard Version" of the floating missive costs $39.90. The "Premium Version" will set you back $49.90. A version that you make in your kitchen clocks in at around 50 cents.

"Your message may be a love letter. To Catherine or whomever. It may be congratulations or announcements. For a wedding day, a graduation day or a birthday. And, you do not have to write a message on your own. You may want to give the bottle away as a present. Or hand it over to someone. For a special reason and with your personal message. It´s up to you. There are reasons enough. As well as messages that are worth to go around the world. Above all, there are people that are worth to make them happy."

We're sure "Catherine or whomever" is a deserving recipient. But, for now, we'll stick to courier pigeons. Or Snapchat.

Message from a Bottle will unleash its first batch of bottles in August. The bottles will begin their journey together in a wooden box that will ultimately decompose over time. After that, "each bottle will go its own way."

"Let's see if someone will find the bottle with your message. You should be thrilled. Especially about when and where your bottle will be found. Once we know it, we will tell you."

We're standing by.