Kidnap Survivors' Ordeal Just Beginning

July 26, 2002 -- Erica Pratt, Mary Katherine Smart and Sarah Ahn are all kidnapping survivors, but their battles to put their ordeals behind them are just beginning.

Erica, 7, is a kidnapping escapee who managed to gnaw through the duct tape binding her arms and flee the abductors who grabbed her off a Philadelphia street Monday and allegedly demanded ransom from her family for her safe return. Sarah, 6, and Mary Katherine, 9, are the only known witnesses to kidnappings — one that ended in murder while the other remains a mystery.

Sarah saw her 5-year-old playmate, Samantha Runnion, snatched off the street kicking and screaming on July 15. Samantha's nude body was found the next day. Mary Katherine was the only witness to her 14-year-old sister Elizabeth's mysterious abduction from their Utah home on June 5. Elizabeth has not been seen since and police have not named a suspect in the case.

Experts say these young victims' recovery from their kidnapping experiences will depend largely on how well their parents and loved ones cope with the ordeal themselves.

"It's really important for parents to know their children, know their child's history, and really listen to their children," said Gail Gross, a Houston-based child psychologist who lectures extensively on juvenile behavior. "Through listening, they're letting them tell them how they feel, because really, they are both going through a grieving process.

"It's really important that parents confirm their children's feelings, validate what they're feeling and don't burden them with whatever issues they [the parents] may have in dealing with the experience," Gross continued. "If the adult says everything will be all right, then the child will believe everything will be all right. … Children really take cues from the adults around them."

Balancing More Love and Affection With a Return to Routine

Whenever children experience trauma such as a kidnapping, experts say they may feel like a sense of insecurity — that the world around them as they once knew it no longer exists. Depending on their experiences, some children may become hypersensitive to certain sounds, may have bad dreams or sleep disturbances inspired by the kidnapping, and may feel anxiety.

If they learn that a playmate was killed, as Sarah Ahn did in the slaying of Samantha Runnion, they may feel a sense of shortened future. Children may suddenly not be interested in certain activities they once loved.

Parents and caregivers must establish a balance of spending more time with their children while making sure they return to their pre-traumatic experience routines as soon as possible.

"If they seem to be more clingy, or clinging more to the parents, that should not be rejected," said Karin Jordan, director of the Graduate Department of Counseling at George Fox University in Oregon. "One thing about children who go through traumatic experiences is that routines need to be maintained. … Routines give a child a sense of security."

Jordan added that while children should be encouraged to talk about their feelings, they should not be pushed. And parents, teachers and caregivers should remember that young children often communicate their feelings differently than older children and adults.

"If a child is pushed, that can often create more anxiety, more trauma," Jordan said. "It's also important to remember that children, especially young children, do not communicate their feelings the way an adult would. So, it's important that parents observe what and how children play. Sometimes children go through a process of playing out what they're feeling, what they've experienced."

In addition, Jordan said parents should also be observant of the children's artwork in looking for signs of depression.

Avoiding Role Reversal

Because of their young age, experts say kidnapping witnesses like Mary Katherine Smart and Sarah Ahn will not likely feel survivor's guilt, asking questions like "Why was she kidnapped and not me?" or "Why did I survive?"

"If their parents are not constantly asking those questions, then they won't likely ask those questions or have those feelings," said Gross.

However, parents must stress to kidnapping escapees and young surviving witnesses that the abduction was not their fault and that they could not have prevented it.

"It's important that parents stress, 'Yes, we love you. We're glad you're alive.… We're glad you're safe,'" Jordan said. "And it's important that parents tell the child there was nothing they could have done to stop the kidnapping because an adult did this and you are just a child."

For Erica Pratt, she and her relatives can breathe a sigh of relief and they may feel a sense of closure, since the two suspects in her kidnapping were arrested Thursday.

For Sarah Ahn and her parents, there is relief, grief and limited closure because her description of Samantha Runnion's kidnapper helped lead to the arrest of Alejandro Avila for kidnapping and murder. However, Sarah's parents may have to prepare her to relive a horrible experience, as she may have to testify at Avila's trial.

For Mary Katherine Smart, there is no closure. Her sister Elizabeth remains missing after seven weeks, and Mary Katherine was the last person known to have seen her alive.

Parents must make sure that such young survivors receive the support and counseling they may need to avoid role reversal, where their children begin to act as their comforters and protectors.

"It's also important that parents don't blame themselves and know they did all they could and could not have prevented what happened. Parents really need reassurance and a lot of support during times like these, just like children," Jordan said. "You don't want children finding themselves playing the role of the parents and vice versa."