NFL Wives Nurture Marriages to Reduce Cheating


Many football players' wives do have husbands who don't fool around, according to Robbins. But recent scandals have created a stereotype of the testosterone-charged jock.

"That's our biggest challenge," she said. "A lot of people assume that because we are married or dating athletes that they are going to cheat. It's not the case."

Psychologists say there is realistically no bulwark against cheating. And high-profile, big-ego athletes are vulnerable.

"Women who marry these guys have to have an understanding of what they are getting into," said Richard Lustberg, a psychologist who blogs on

"The husband isn't going to be home for six months and he's going to be fawned and fussed upon," he said. "You really have to have that kind of emotional make-up."

He is cynical about the company's approach to marital bliss.

"Give me a break, you think so?" he said. "It's about as deep as a tot's wading pool."

The group also offers opportunities for businesses to target athletes -- from upscale hotels to wealth management companies and exclusive travel agencies.

But giving sponsors access to their marketable husbands seems a bad idea, giving their hunky hubbies even more temptations.

"Their capacity to meet people is greater, so ultimately that creates more opportunities," said Lustberg. "If you drive a car 50,000 miles a year, you are going to have more accidents."

"What are they going to do, report on each other?" he asked.

But Off the Market says it is not a watchdog group.

"One of the things we always say is important is communication," said Robbins. "I encourage him to tell me and share with me. Openness and trust is most important."

"When your husband is 6-foot 5-inches tall and people see him, they assume he plays the sport," she said. "He's always getting looks. We joke about it and sometimes he gives them my number."

"We are definitely not naive and I know there are going to be women [who come on to him]," she said. "But we are comfortable and confident."

But can these wives make a difference?

"If a football player or any other player wants to cheat, they'll do it," said Dr. Sel Lederman, a New York psychologist who specializes in relationships. "It really is their choice. However, various things can be done to make it less likely."

Lederman recommends talking about infidelity and the couple's expectations before marriage.

"They will be tempted," he said. "The more successful the guy is, the more pressures and different manipulations will be aimed at him," said Lederman. "They will be admired by a lot of women…Having a trophy husband is the ultimate."

Athletes also tend to feel entitled to their affairs, according to Lederman.

"Many of them had to work to be where they are," he said. "They have put in a lot of extra hours…They have to put in a lot of effort and think, 'I earned it. I did the time.' They think they should get the fun and the glory, or the respect or the adulation or the money."

"One of the other things that pushes a guy to act out is they know any single day that their career can be over," he said. "So that's what's in the back of their minds. It could all end in two minutes."

Still, Lederman said the company seems "contrived."

  • 1
  • |
  • 2
  • |
  • 3
Join the Discussion
blog comments powered by Disqus
You Might Also Like...