Steinhart argues that the medical and pharmaceutical community is dictating new norms: "Whose definition of sexual desire are we talking about?" asked the New York City sex educator.
"Is it lack of sexual desire or do we have expectations that we are supposed to be hypersexualized women at 16, 26, 36 and so on?" asked Steinhart.
"Take a look at any MTV video or at Beyonce," she said. "Who can even move that way? She works so hard on the dance floor, I'll bet she goes to sleep early, too."
Men have a built-in "biofeedback mechanism" for desire, according to Steinhart. "When they are aroused they can see their erection and it reinforces their arousal. Women don't have the parallel opportunity."
"[Young women] are so tired from working so hard that they think sex is supposed to be a release and a relief and often it isn't," she said.
"A lot of women say the best part of traveling is the hotel room with the giant bed and the clean sheets and no children crying and a husband who wants something from them," said Steinhart. "Truthfully, women have always been this way."
"One reason is stress," said the Los Angeles therapist. "It's a libido killer."
"Right now, people are losing jobs and working longer hours," said Berman. "They are doing two or three people's jobs and taking pay decreases. They are exhausted."
Women are often the primary breadwinner or are under pressure to make up for the family's financial shortages.
"From what I am seeing young women are feeling older than their age," said Berman. "They have diminished sex libido and are too tired to care."
Just because a woman has low sex drive now, doesn't mean it's permanent.
"Most people don't realize that their sex lives ebb and flow throughout a lifetime," said Berman. "It can be low this week and the next month the couple is having sex five times a week. All is not lost."
"Couples who just gave birth are unlikely to be going at it," she said. "But when the kids have left for college and there's an empty nest, there is a revival of the sex drive."