Last December Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban surprised fans when they announced the birth of their daughter Faith, their child born via a gestational carrier. Kidman has since spoken openly about her ups and downs with fertility, most recently on last Sunday's Australian "60 Minutes."
Kidman's willingness to discuss her fertility woes is a refreshing change from all the secrecy that typically surrounds late blooming celebu-moms. Kelly Preston, John Travolta's wife, was 48 when she gave birth to their son Benjamin this January. She's kept completely mum about the baby's conception.
Back in 2009, Sarah Jessica Parker, then 43, was a little more forthcoming when announcing she and husband Matthew Broderick used a surrogate to carry their twin girls though she pointedly avoided answering questions about egg and sperm donors. Even the late Elizabeth Edwards, usually known for her refreshing candor, refused to talk about how she was able to conceive, carry and deliver two children when she was approaching the age of 50.
The truth that rarely comes across as we view pictures of 40- and even 50-something famous moms holding up their babies in People Magazine, is that most women over 40 will struggle to conceive, especially if they want a biological child.
"Everyone thinks that they can get pregnant forever," Dr. Laura Corio, a top Manhattan ob/gyn, said. "Patients will often complain that so and so had a baby and never seemed to have any issues. They often can't believe it when I explain to them that we have no idea what so and so went through to get pregnant and it probably wasn't as simple as they've led everyone to believe."
The oldest woman in Corio's practice to conceive with no help at all from modern science was 46. "And we're talking one event like this in 30 years of practice," she said.
So while it's not exactly the stuff of Ripley's Believe It or Not, many in the medical community still consider it outside the norm for a 40-plus woman to conceive naturally. Dr. Kari Sproul, a Santa Monica, Calif., infertility specialist, said that for each year after age 30, fertility drops precipitously. By age 45 or so, the majority of women are quite infertile. The chance of getting pregnant without assisted reproductive technology after age 40 is only about 10 percent. During any given month, the chances of a woman over the age of 45 getting pregnant under her own steam and with her own eggs is less than 1 percent.
Sproul stressed that it isn't a matter of simply trying harder either. Women are born with all the eggs they'll ever have; by puberty only about 300,000 remain and of these only 300 or so will mature and be released through ovulation.
"Even the healthiest woman's reproductive capabilities become less and less efficient as she ages so that by the time she hits menopause she only has about a thousand eggs left and most of them aren't viable."