Kelly Rutherford Describes the Moment She Decided to Keep Her Kids in US

— -- Kelly Rutherford recently opened up about the moment she decided not to return her two children to their father and her ex-husband Daniel Giersch in Monaco.

"They were totally great the entire time. We were painting, horseback riding," Rutherford told People magazine. "Then right when they knew they were going to go back, they got really panicky. My daughter was crying, my son started saying, 'Mommy, I'm afraid.'"

Rutherford said that's when she made a spontaneous decision to keep them in the U.S.

"If I put them on a plane, I realized I may never see them again," the former "Gossip Girl" actress said. "I sent an email to Daniel telling him where we were. I just needed a moment to figure out what to do."

Rutherford was supposed to send son Hermes, 8, and daughter Helena, 6, back to their father on Aug. 7 after spending the summer with them. Instead, the actress, 46, released a statement that weekend, saying, "I have decided that I cannot lawfully send my children away from the United States to live in a foreign country."

Giersch's legal team fired back, demanding return of the children and filing a motion in a New York County Supreme Court. Following a hearing Aug. 11, Judge Ellen Gesmer ordered Rutherford to hand the children over to Giersch's mother, who immediately flew back to Monaco to reunite them with their father.

Rutherford told ABC News last week that she is devastated to have her U.S.-born children living 6,000 miles away.

"I can sit here and tell you how often I cry. ... I can tell you how it feels to leave my kids in a foreign country ... to see them after not seeing them for weeks on end," Rutherford said. "Not being able to drop them off at school, pick them up from school, dress them, smell them, hug them."

An attorney for Giersch told ABC News in a statement on Friday that "Daniel Giersch continues to protect the children from any negativity and therefore will continue to not engage in any of these unfortunate and false media fabrications which only serve one person but clearly not the children."

Meanwhile, Rutherford has vowed to continue fighting to regain custody.

"I told my son, 'Mommy is still fighting for you,'" she told ABC News.

Giersch has a hearing in Monaco scheduled for Sept. 3 to determine whether the court there has jurisdiction over the custody case.