Some People Actually Enjoy Hurricanes
By ROMINA PUGA
When most people hear the word "hurricane" they lock themselves indoors with supplies, candles, and Anderson Cooper on their battery-powered TV sets.
There are a select few who turn on Scorpions' "Rock You Like a Hurricane" full blast as they grab their rain boots, boards, or bear costumes.
1. Surfers
These guys (and girls) are crazy. They must make the worst beach dates. I can hear the 5 A.M. phone call now: "Hey, I have a great idea... Why don't we go to the beach while it's raining and windy and jump in the freezing water to surf?"
(Silence from the other end of the call) "You want to go at noon and when it's sunny? Where's the fun in that?!"
Ugh. Sorry Patrick Swayze in Point Break. You're a babe with great hair, but no thank you.
2. Almost Every Student in the World
Students in the north get snow days in the winter.
Students in South Florida get hurricane days in September.
On this rare occasion, students in the north are getting hurricane days.
Schools and universities are closed Monday and Tuesday this week because of Sandy. But does it even matter what natural disaster is destroying your streets? So long as the Internet doesn't break down, getting days off from school is the greatest gift a school could give a child.
3. Storm Chasers
There's a reason a whole show is dedicated to these adrenaline-junkies. PLUS there is that major blockbuster movie we all love to re-watch (Twister):
4. 24-Hour News Networks
Hurricanes equal ratings. News anchors yearn for that Ron Burgundy moment when they can tell the public they've "just been handed an urgent and horrifying news story."
5. Supermarkets
Tensions run high for that last crate of bottled water and double-A batteries. I don't know how many fights you've witnessed over a bag of jelly beans, but I've seen quite a few during hurricane season in Miami. But the real fighting usually goes on in the alcohol aisle.
We doubt anyone will run into this guy while shopping for Hurricane supplies, but wouldn't it be awesome if they did? I bet everyone would join in.
6. Canned Food Companies
Yeah, yeah, yeah. You grab your peas, your corn, your peaches, all the usual canned options… but don't forget the most famous canned food of all (besides Campbell's Tomato Soup)... SPAM!
7. Anderson Cooper and Weather Reporters
Get a guy in a poncho to stand on a beach during a hurricane and you've got yourself some great ratings. The awkward part is when they cut from the soaked reporter outside back to the warm, dry, and clean anchors in the newsroom talking about how horrible the weather is.
8. And then there's this guy.
Stay safe everyone! Unless you have a bear outfit, do NOT go outside.