PR President Has a Cow Over Empty Milk Carton

Keith Zakheim, the president of Beckerman PR, fired off a lengthy and harshly worded email to the employees in the company’s New Jersey office Tuesday, suggesting that the next person who did not replace the milk would be fired.

Keith Zakheim, President of Beckerman PR

Like any hard-charging leader of a multimillion-dollar public relations firm, Zakheim means business. It seems a recent milk-less morning set off the boss’ rage.

“So, imagine my chagrin this morning when I stumbled in at 715 after enduring a typically painful Redskins loss and in dire need of a shot of caffeine, only to find that the skim milk in the refrigerator had three drops of milk left,” Zakheim wrote. “Literally 3 drops, an amount that would maybe fill the tummy of a prematurely born mouse. The person that did this is either incredibly lazy, obnoxiously selfish or woefully devoid of intelligence – 3 traits that are consistent with the profile of FORMER Beckerman employees.”

The email was first leaked to Gawker, which posted the missive in its entirety.

Zakheim has not responded to an email request asking for a comment. Allyne Mills, general manager of the company’s New Jersey office, said Zakheim was on vacation for Rosh Hashannah.

“Of course, no one is going to be fired for not replacing the milk. The point of the email was to communicate strongly that we have a culture of mutual respect and behavior,” she said, adding that Zakheim would probably admit that the “wording was strong” in his email.

 ”But for people who work here,” she said, “they understand the email and the spirit that was intended.”