Chuck Lorre to Write Charlie Sheen Tell-All?

Chuck Lorre and Charlie Sheen in happier times.

You’d think Chuck Lorre would be hugging random tourists on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, what with the Ashton Kutcher-helmed “Two and a Half Men” ruling the ratings and that messy Charlie Sheen lawsuit finally settled.

But no.

At the end of Monday’s “Two and a Half Men,” Lorre’s vanity card — the blink-and-you’ll-miss-it statement he airs at the conclusion of all his shows — all but officially laid out his feelings about this year’s Sheen saga.

“Sometime last year I realized I had become the unwilling contestant in a reality show,” Lorre said in the card. “I didn’t understand the rules, wasn’t sure if there even were any, and pretty much hated every second of it. For many months I kept hoping and praying that it would end. But it did not. Somewhere along the way, something inside me died. Anyway, now, suddenly, I’m being told that the reality show’s been cancelled.”

“Apparently, it was just one of those things that somehow got out of control,” he continued. “Sorry. Whoops. Live and learn. Moving on. Game over. And that’s fine. I am so good with that. Yes, please, let’s all move on.”

But there’s a part of Lorre that wants to dwell in the dirt.

“There’s just one problem,” he added. “That thing inside me that died? It walks at night. It’s angry. It’s hungry. And worst of all…it’s writing a tell-all book.”

So can we expect a Sheen tell-all from the “Two and a Half Men” creator? Lorre’s rep didn’t immediately respond to’s request for comment. Maybe his next vanity card will offer more clues.

Join the Discussion
blog comments powered by Disqus
You Might Also Like...