J-Lo on Love with Casper Smart

Cosmopolitan

Three marriages later, Jennifer Lopez finally knows what she wants in a relationship.

"For me, it's about having a great partner to walk this life with," Lopez told Cosmopolitan magazine for its October issue. "I have my own high standards for what I want in a partner and how I want to be treated."

The 44-year-old mother of two has been seeing her former backup dancer, 26-year-old Beau "Casper" Smart, since October 2011, soon after announcing her split from third husband Marc Anthony.

Judging from the photo of the two locking lips in the new edition of Cosmo, they are still very much in love.

"I bring a lot to the table. I'm not talking about material things but what I have to offer as a person - love and loyalty and all the things that make a good relationship," Lopez told the magazine.

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Lopez expects the same in return.

"It's funny, early on with Beau, I remember telling him how I have a real button on being ignored," she told Cosmo. "And he was like, 'Listen, if somebody ignores you, then forget them. They don't deserve to have your attention.' But it's funny. Sometimes when we don't get it, we try to get it in a negative way, you know?"

Lopez is headed back as a judge for the new season of "American Idol," yet there was a time before she had twins Max and Emme that she battled insecurities.

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"The biggest insecurity I had was my singing," she admitted. "Even though I had sold 70 million records, there was this feeling like, I'm not good at this. And while I was married to Marc, he helped me get over it. He kept telling me, 'You're the only one holding yourself back from reaching your full potential as a singer. You have to let go.'"

"I was always so insecure and just kind of going along. Then I grew, little by little, and realized, wait a minute, this is not a fluke. I'm not a mistake - I work my a** off. And I know what I'm doing," Lopez said.