I’ve never written about my pregnancies…

I’ve been pregnant four times and I have two beautiful girls. I suppose it’s time I do share the whole story.

I was first pregnant when I was 23 years old. This baby was very much wanted. We hadn’t necessarily tried hard to get pregnant… but after being married 3 years… we felt it was a good time to add a baby to the family.

My first ultrasound revealed an ectopic pregnancy and I was rushed to the hospital to remove it. During the surgery… it was discovered that I also had an embryo in my uterus. The doctor gave little hope for it’s survival. I carried this survivor for three months and at that point I lost the pregnancy. I had to undergo another surgery and it was a whole year before I even thought of trying again.

Losing a baby… two babies in fact… was difficult. I ate very little. I slept even less. I began to develop anxiety and depression. I had few interests and didn’t want to go out with friends. After some therapy and a little medication… I felt the desire to try and have a baby again.

I was pregnant on the first try and knew it right away. That familiar feeling of sickness. fatigue, and joy enveloped me like an old friend. I was careful not to tell too many people, but it was written all over my face. I was pregnant and overjoyed. One month later… I miscarried. Again.

This time I was determined. I was going to have a baby. We tried again and the very next month… I was pregnant again.

And she decided to stick around. Rachel Michele Loubet was born on August 25th, 2004. I had my baby.

And when she was six months old… I was pregnant again with her sister, Allison… Although I wouldn’t know it for another three months.

So… I have two beautiful girls after enduring the joy and pain of four pregnancies. I was asked to write about what I worried about most while I was pregnant. I worried most about losing another baby. I worried that I’d never be able to carry to term. I worried that I’d never know what it was like to deliver a child into the world. Those are the things I worried most about.

Becoming pregnant changed my life, and I’d love to hear more about your best or most difficult pregnancy moments. What worried you most during your pregnancy? By replying, you will be entered to win an exclusive Million Moms Challenge Gift Pack, which includes an all expenses paid trip to a conference on mothers hosted by the UN Foundation in DC (Jan/Feb 2012), an iPad2, a custom-made Million Moms Challenge pendant and $50 donation in your name to Global Giving.

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This is a sponsored conversation written by me on behalf of Million Moms Challenge. The opinions and text are all mine. Contest runs September 19 to October 16, 2011. A random winner will be announced by October 18, 2011.

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