Michelle Obama opens up about miscarriage, IVF and marriage counseling: Part 2

The former first lady shares her struggle with infertility and that she and her husband sought marriage counseling in hopes that other young couples will know they are not alone.
6:42 | 11/12/18

Coming up in the next {{countdown}} {{countdownlbl}}

Coming up next:



Skip to this video now

Now Playing:


Related Extras
Related Videos
Video Transcript
Transcript for Michelle Obama opens up about miscarriage, IVF and marriage counseling: Part 2
??? At last my love has come along ??? Reporter: This was the first time America got to know Michelle and Barack Obama as a very romantic, very connected, couple. I remember speaking with the new president just moments after that iconic inaugural ball dance. Mr. President. Sounds good, doesn't it? You know, it's got a certain ring to it. Reporter: But what led up to that golden moment for this couple wasn't always a fairy tale. In her book, Michelle Obama calls this part of her story becoming us about the meeting and marriage that would transform the trajectory of her life and challenge her in ways she would never expect. You ready to talk about Barack? Who? You ready to talk about -- by age 25, Michelle had executed a meticulous game plan for achievement and success. I was a box checker. And I was checking off my box. You know, I got into princeton, great. What am I going to do next? I don't know. Why don't I go to law school? Got into Harvard, I'm going to Harvard, check. You know, got my, you know, got my big firm position, check. Reporter: That big firm position was at the Chicago law firm of Sidley and Austin. You're at this law firm -- Got it all together. You got it all together. I had made a declaration that I was off men. I was focusing on my career. I had my checklist. I was -- You were -- Getting it down. Locked, focused -- Was focused. Reporter: And then she was asked to mentor an incoming summer associate, a man two years older, already rumored to be an exceptionally gifted law student. He's still a law student -- Uh-huh. -- At Harvard. Right. A first year. First year. You're going to be his mentor. He comes blowing into town, a little bit famous already. Late for the first meeting. Late. Late. I was, like, "Is he trifling? The black man's gonna be late on the first day? I was like, hmm. You weren't overly impressed in the beginning? I wasn't, you know? I have my suspicions when a bunch of white folks fawn on over a black man 'cause I sorta think, "Okay, he can talk straight so they think he's wonderful." So that was my theory. And then his name was Barack Obama. He was from Hawaii. I thought, "What," you know? So I didn't really know what to expect. And then in walks Barack Obama. And Barack Obama has always walked like Barack Obama. Like, he's got all the time in the world. He's -- he had that stride. I was, like, "Dude, you're cute." But in my mind, I was, like -- Not interested? Off limits. Not even not interested. I'm not gonna date the -- one of the few black summer associates. Robin, how tacky, you know? Reporter: But she quickly found herself drawn to him. And by July, her resolve to avoid romance began to falter. We had been hanging out, getting closer. Barack had suggested that we date. But I was, like, "No, no, meet my friends. Do this, do that. It wouldn't be right, no." And he was, like, "You're crazy. We should date. I like you, you like me." And he was very -- and I liked that about him. He was very straightforward. He wasn't playing games. I say that to the ladies out there. Not a game play. Very clear about what he wanted. When we stopped for ice cream and he got the sense that I was starting to open up, and he, you know, he played it real smooth. He just leaned in for a kiss. And that really was it. You know, from that kiss on, we were -- it was -- it was love. And he was my -- my man. Do you think I'm cute? I didn't say that. Reporter: Years later, there's an entire movie, "Southside with you" based on that first date. You want some? Sure. Reporter: And there's a tribute at the Chicago ice cream shop. You realize there's a plaque there, right? I know! The kids are highly embarrassed that there's a plaque about their parents' first kiss. Reporter: But she doesn't hold back from describing their young passion. There are many things in reading that -- your book that I don't think I would ever imagine hearing from a first lady. Uh-huh. Reporter: Lust. You talked about lust for your man. Uh-huh. That's not something you expect to hear or read from a first lady. But it's there. I don't know what to tell you. It was -- it was there. It still is. I love my husband a lot. Reporter: But while their mutual affection has always been on display, now, for the first time, Michelle is opening up about parts of their marriage she held deeply private for years. First, infertility. It turns out that even two committed go getters with a deep love and a robust work ethic can't will themselves into being pregnant. Reporter: She did get pregnant but then weeks later she miscarried. I felt lost and alone. And I feel -- I felt like I failed because I didn't know how common miscarriages were because we don't talk about 'em. We sit in our own pain, thinking that somehow we're broken. Reporter: She reveals that it was with the help of infertility treatments that Malia, and then Sasha, were finally conceived. The biological clock is real because egg production is limited. And I realized that as I was 34 and 35. We had to do ivf. I think it's the worst thing that we do to each other as women, not share the truth about our bodies and how they work and how they don't work. Reporter: And for the first time she shares details about how the stress of their hectic schedules infiltrated their marriage. You write about at one point in your marriage that you and Barack went to marriage counseling. Uh-huh. Why did you think it was important to share that? Marriage counseling for us was one of those ways where we learned how to talk out our differences. What I learned about myself was that my happiness was up to me. And I started working out more. I started asking for help, not just from him, but from other people. I stopped feeling guilty. I know too many young couples who struggle and think that somehow there's something wrong with them. And I want them to know that Michelle and Barack Obama, who have a phenomenal marriage and who love each other, we work on our marriage. And we get help with our marriage when we need it.

This transcript has been automatically generated and may not be 100% accurate.

{"duration":"6:42","description":"The former first lady shares her struggle with infertility and that she and her husband sought marriage counseling in hopes that other young couples will know they are not alone.","mediaType":"default","section":"ABCNews/2020","id":"59129032","title":"Michelle Obama opens up about miscarriage, IVF and marriage counseling: Part 2","url":"/2020/video/michelle-obama-opens-miscarriage-ivf-marriage-counseling-part-59129032"}