Report Claims Equality Kills Romance

A New York Times Magazine report claims sharing household chores kills the spark in the bedroom.
3:00 | 02/07/14

Coming up in the next {{countdown}} {{countdownlbl}}

Coming up next:



Skip to this video now

Now Playing:


Related Extras
Related Videos
Video Transcript
Transcript for Report Claims Equality Kills Romance
Mr. Let's do it. Provocative report claiming too much equality in a relationship can hurt a romance in "New York times" magazine. Is it killing the spark in the bedroom. ABC's bazi kanani has the story. Reporter: A new theory may advise you. Don't forget your lunches. Reporter: 1950s moms like June cleaver might have had more intimate moments with their spouses than wives in today's modern families. Did you sleep all right? No. Reporter: Psychotherapist Lori Gottlieb writes in this Sunday's "New York times" magazine that couples have less sex in egalitarian marriages when husband and wife equally share responsibilities like housekeeping, child care and moneymaking. If a man is working outside of the home and then working in the home the same as a working woman is he's tired too at the end of the day. Right so men are getting headaches at the end of the night too. Reporter: Gottlieb says husbands who cook, vacuum and laundry have sex 1 1/2 fewer types per month than those who do not. If they do a lot of feminine chores like cooking and cleaning and laundry, the women report that not only are they less likely to have sex with their husbands but they are less satisfied with the sex than if men do more masculine chores like taking out the trash, fixing the car. Reporter: If today's modern egalitarian couples are having less sex -- It doesn't necessarily mean they're less happy. Reporter: Because Gottlieb says equality in a marriage can lead to other forms of intimacy. I would not trade an egalitarian partnership for anything. I think that egalitarian partnerships offer us so many benefits. Reporter: For "Good morning America," bazi kanani, ABC news, Los Angeles. Okay, we threw the question to our viewers, does too much equality in a relationship kill the romance? A lot of great responses. One viewer says "Heck nah. Makes for big fights and great makeup. We all think we're equal till we don't." Another viewer tweets "Ear also absolute these days. What kills romance for some builds deeper bonds for others. Vive la difference. We'll bring in donna Barnes. Fascinating article but, you know, is there real science behind this? I don't know if it's science but I think it's actually reality. I think that, you know, they say familiarity breeds con E. So when you're too much together, when you hear couples starting to say we finish each other's sentences, that's not good. I think you need to have your own lives in some way so that you have something to share with each other that they don't already know. If you already know -- commonality is what makes a relationship work but opposites attract on a superficial level and I think, yes, you want to get along and you want to have that core, you want your best friend but you also -- do you spend every day with your actual best friend? No, you have your other lives and then you're excited when you see each other. So if you see each other constantly you need to make a real conscious effort to have separate things and do other things so that you're excited when you see your -- Almost like -- Talking about one being sort of in charge over the other? I mean -- Well, yeah, well, power in a relationship is always interesting, but they actually kind of say who loves least is master so if you lose respect for your partner, that's dangerous so if now your partner is doing all the things you normally do and you know you can they become an extension of yourself and hopefully you love yourself but you're not attracted to yourself. Do you have suggestions. Yeah, it's all about your thinking. It's what you think is so important. So assuming you love your partner and you're attracted to them allow yourself to be sexual and to fantasy is a great thing. The more you get your thoughts going and think about that and whole Nike just do it for exercise, I think really applies to sex too. When you come home and you're exhausted, feel like you're not in the mood. If you are attracted to your partner, allow your thoughts to get you in the mood. Let them get you in the mood. I promise you you'll enjoy it. Just allow yourself to get there. I will never look at that slogan again the same way. Just do it. Just do it. Nike ahead of its time in so many ways. Thank you, donna.

This transcript has been automatically generated and may not be 100% accurate.

{"duration":"3:00","description":"A New York Times Magazine report claims sharing household chores kills the spark in the bedroom.","mediaType":"default","section":"ABCNews/GMA","id":"22406559","title":"Report Claims Equality Kills Romance","url":"/GMA/video/york-times-magazine-report-claims-equality-sharing-chores-22406559"}