Transcript for Carrie Fisher on Experiencing Manic Depression
I'm Mary depressive. As a terrify you civil. War it's I own it I'm mentally ill. I have a chemical imbalance that. In its lowest fixed rules state will lead me. Two a mental hospital. 00. These are home movies that captured her mania. The chemical disorder which creates such a war of energy in the brain it's like a 24 hour carnival ride. She says she was a teenager when she first had doubts of uncontrollable mood swings frenzied faults by day night after night without sleep. Her monologues were an attempt to silence the war and tied her fears from her friends. You know yeah you can't beat yourself that's how hard you all the time not only time. Hello I'm. We can't stop. Very painful it's a law. No it's it's it's rough your bones burns when you're not busy talking and trying to drown it out but it. The feeling of having been. Court too much personality it then spills out your eyes your mouth. I have to moods one Moody's Roy. Rollicking rolling the wild ride of a movie and Pam said in his hand was stands on the shore and so. One Moody's in the open next buddhists to check. Sometimes the tide is and sometimes it's out. She says Roy kept her careening from one bad idea to another uncontrollable spending she'd just make more money and spend that two. And wild behavior with the people around her every relationship oh Whitewater ride. The world of manic depression is a world of bad judgment calls just every kind of badgers because it all seemed like a good idea at the time. A great idea these non stop Saturday night so if it's talking if it's. Shot being if it's traveling if it's. And the weirdest. One for me is sacks that's only happened twice but then it's. Why Powell glorious you know just every body looks like a good idea. So when you haven't been seen for months ago period. Eleven grueling. Please leave messages in thing. And then people would be glad. The other mood doesn't answer the if I went to someone's house was always going through their cabinets and you know high it was I said I was Robin Hood I. Took from the straight and gave to the potentially stoned me. By the third Star Wars she says she was using pills heavily to sleep at night am about to begin a four year drug binge with no lid on it. In The Blues Brothers she says Dan actually did get her off cocaine but she went back. By Harry met Sally she seemed fine by day but. I've got the perfect guy I don't happen to find attractive but you line stayed up late snorted heroin. That's nice my mother will be so proud. I'm actually she. Under the rainbow is the one where I was completely. Crazed. I was on drugs. I started losing a lot of weight I think I weigh about 95 in this film I was not sleeping I had a seizure on the set. A doctor told her she had a form of mania but she didn't believe it even though hallucinatory. Drugs. Brought a kind of rests to her fevered brain. And I can't help because I thought that would look. Yeah it would be great party. How I felt normal on acid. So Ellis. The people that we're taking and I took over I knew how to handle it because it wasn't any farther out than. I'd ever been I don't understand you're 24. They tell you they give you the name I thought they told me it was manic depressant and if you feel better. About being a drug addict. It's what you think. If you can just control yourself you just had an indulge childhood you were. The child of privilege and I don't know that's what I thought you're just a drug addict so each day you'd wake up did you decide which you needed that in order to feel. Less. Just feel less you know there's that term. I could care less. I could. I could care a lot lives. 20% of medic to press has become so despairing. They kill themselves. She says her own thoughts of suicide and love of her daughter got her to a hospital and once there she didn't sleep for six full day eight. She became a one woman carousel of Jabber and hallucinations terrorist confusion. And was taken to a psychiatric. Ward they checked me and they had me sign a paper. God knows what a lot. But I stirring with my left hand and Shean. And I only remember that recently. So when they say psychotic break. Something is raking it and as it's breaking. It's horrible. Terror ring its terror from. I thought I was telling me like accidentally we'll I was dying to this. I died for this thing. This two. As she headed toward complete madness. Bryant and the father of her daughter Billy came to see her. She pointed to an imaginary Krejci carry across the room and then one lucid moment begged him to protect their child. By taking her away. And I said to him. She's in the two year and she's let me out for second I have to tell you something. I can't take care Billy all by myself I really need you now we can't do this anymore and she's going to come and get me. And the second you must listen to me and I went into this other. Police and it's. It was a very sensual. Experience it really wives I mean could it was as though you could. Feel the back. Of the cool of the mood with you have the planet here. And I was hallucinating. I could see cities of futuristic cities out the window. What I have to say now about it is. Losing your mind. Which is what happened. Is it harmful and but once it's gone. It's fine. It's completely fine because there's no part of you left that those arrested the dismissing. With the possibilities. That you might never have needed him. Well they called Brian and they said you should make plans for you in your daughter as we don't know. If she'll ever come back I mean she will but we don't know in what could initiate. Well yeah. Today thanks to doctors time and six different medications taken daily. She's not only back she is back with a vengeance are you worried that people will be some that in. Now they look so good I used to think that people's hair. With heavier on one's mind can stay with thing. More you. Know because I I feel a certain way about it. Whether it's it's taken long term. And I have to accept. Number of things to get to that things. Carrie Fisher once wrote I have a visa for happiness. Or sadness a lifetime pass. I outlasted blight problems. I am mentally ill. I can say that I am not ashamed that I. Survived that I'm still surviving it but. IE there's not much to bring it on. You know better me than you so. Happily ever after. No such Errol. Mirrors what is it then what's the edge ten. Everything ever after.
This transcript has been automatically generated and may not be 100% accurate.