Transcript for 'Motivated' podcast: Finding body acceptance through yoga
Part three this afternoon with the wonderful and I know him as testament Stanley you are a body positive advocate you are a yoga teacher extraordinaire you are and instead Graham sensation. Oh now you are a published author. Everybody yoga let go of the year get them and love your body. Thank you so much for having me congratulations. Surreal. At the same time I'm just glad that I was able to rated. The people defeated and it's cool that we're able to talk about it mostly I'm just glad it's world. I'm so you become a huge inspiration for a lot of people I want to read. It's basically start your book wrecked it's great that the passage from. I'm your new book. And that chapter called wide directors and you say because all yoga bodies deserve to be represented in print not just those that are slender female and white. I wrote this book for every fat person every old person in every exceptionally short person yoga is for everybody and every body. You don't have to embody anything other than your true missed and most on itself in order to practice you. You read it. Is. That we're out of about that basically I feel like. Don't really see that much represented representation. Of other kinds of practitioners besides just sister and her heterosexual white women and. I think that that's not because there are plenty of people there are not people who were doing it there are plenty of people who book. A different from that norm. But because the image is so slanted towards like making money in making money off of white women who buy things. It just means that there Ali's people who don't see themselves represented and I think regardless of what companies are gonna do or any kind of branding. I think it's important that we see more representation of different bodies that we talk about the fact that. Joseph doesn't really have anything to do with the shape or color or an amount of money. That you can do it without any tools that you can do it without standing up that it's really just about connecting with your breath and that message is so simple and it just gets totally lost in this sea of you know hand stands and the perfect leggings and Matt and I just won its. Give a different perspective and really show how it is for effort. I mean you're you're right about the overwhelming imagery that we see says if you and I have had a very similar response to Ian that. I'm that you describe having initially which was I just didn't feel like it was for me yeah I'm not tall and then and lime and indeed my here isn't like he top not at queens county from one part and it plays right. Please are okay and when I began to practice. I realized what you talk about which is it has nothing to do with. But it's so hard to get to that place in classes where you feel intimidated by the other people who were broad and especially in a city like New York I feel like there's a tendency to wanna conform to everyone else is stressing that whenever you just show up as is really easy to be intimidated and. Totally understand whenever people haven't experienced a gateway turns them off here but. It's unfortunate because all of that. Has absolutely nothing to do with getting in touch with your breath and once you start doing it doesn't matter who is in the room it's that you could be alone you to be in a see full of people and as long as you can tap into that deep inhale deep exhale. You can always you always get exactly. Let's talk about that because I don't know much you know my journeyman eyes started my help them on eastern five years ago with recent program you know and that most of my life. Not having missed in my life. And what I learned and what the key to us from meat was that. Fitness has nothing to do with a fenced in them through the activities that are gonna keep me I'm back day after they're the ones who meet physically and emotionally and spiritually and nothing gives me that more strongly then you. Talking about Thatcher it's interesting to me because I feel like the actual act of being fit and working on your body moving around. It is a spiritual act in and of itself because he you humans are meant to move meant to be active but because we have this association. Weight loss expiration health and wellness everyone brings their packets that conversation and it makes it more difficult to just get to the relative. I just want to move around a few good. Because we searched. Turn cartwheels. One and it's for no reason I'm gonna everywhere you don't. Need time. It doesn't matter. In that feeling as high always feel practice yoga bike when I'm really just in it for myself feel like I am a kid again and I think that when you're tapping into that space. You can get. Nutritional you can work on your nutrition you can work on your. When your focus solely time. The physical experience of it. It's very difficult to get to this much richer later that can give you way more than what the physically touching gifts when you when you really tap into it you're not to try it some have. If you can just stopped doing you know without a field it was just about. Moving my body around and going that week Hollywood's that we have hit just like. That and. Other kinds of exercise and reconsidered you know it should be. In my mind it is it is a spiritual. That's lake. You have determined that instead of looking into the outside world for the year with itself and that. That Johnny doesn't just does not open it goes and every moment as well. And it does go into the things the and it does go and like the way you present yourself but. It's it's just out though. And when you hit a deeper way. But what I love values that you're saying these things and you're just like iron in the death of best you itself like the it's citation and but Ivan its value thing armaments. But. Because nobody is perfect from you leave here thinking you're the perfect. Mind you need is make me feel less. So you know. Talk about the journey of humanity. At it you know nobody is a perfect. The it's like you're trying to be an Angel pilots. Should expand. This to us like we're supposed to beepers and that. You are. You've reached this please high eighty where. Don't ever mean pots and I would them overseas where word in. I just always drink my complexion and eat carrot sticks and it's just like that's anyone's life so I don't understand why we need to pretend is. And I think for a lot of people it's easier to they didn't really look at the darkness but because it is it's dark. And my practice now is really different than it was first practice. And it's a lot darker and it's really just a lot of meek seeing them I go to Matt its crying ward them off them and crying some more of someone who doesn't. Lose interest and use them it's. Coming to these moments in it's it's the same moment. But deep but when rappers are packed this thing I would try to do some. I would just beat it and ultimately been needs a little bit immediately fell over at its Helm of and just been him deepest. The yoga must not be for me is the teacher at us are blaming obstacle. App for myself have attention to protector which is what's happening Billy. It's our you can read them so how are you really feeling. And I'm like I'm still ahead this it. And immensely. There's a million different things that you can fit but once you get to that that's when you're into because it's like you start to tap into issues that. You'd any real eyes were problems. And who. One expands talk about this in the book has the last or that it now. Feeling emotionally thinking about it island when that my yoga teacher training. A dip partner yoga exercise with someone who's lots program. And I think of hers. With Katie she's so cute. Pint size. But she's so much smaller. And exercise that we are dealing that we were leaning on them. And I would lean weight on her immediately apologized because as a larger person been taught that need to be apologetic. Also just. I always feel compelled to so it's basically mean the whole time thing. And and eventually she stopped me and she was late. You know you don't have to apologize for it. It's like I laughed because equipment and mechanism and laugh the Catholic. Doesn't apologizing for existing. This first Evers said it's now even consciously bought it. But it was this process currently practice time building this hire them up top I think it's the fires burn the way the parts needed to be there. And so I am very emotionally vulnerable. When that effort was in an emotional state during the science that was an abnormal. But I said that. I don't I am apologizing for existing she cocked eyebrow at me and kept going I was stuck in my tracks with like. It you're hot and for existing think you deserve to test and that's something it. I would blame on so many things blame them to blame it on my part in the lake. All of these reasons why I'm says. But if your core you'd think you don't deserve to exist where I'll come into play. Saarc. Cried for the rest as high pressure off him partly. Could not stop and it wasn't crying. I'm said it's right need to. And once you start to relieve them of anything asked. For everything that's and working through this strategist. At sees. He's so. And that means the recent because even with Oakley and it's dark and it's time. It's worth because you can actually commit the root of pushing it down. Active. And we pushed some epic comes back and I'm. Why can't we have waters diverted it's still goes some of them so about somebody who is new TO convict him ill and in your book address that the delegates can also overwhelming you follow people on and am. And they're posing these amazing they're postings amazing poses with just fantastic but the nearly cat like it just. Dopamine what do you suggest for again. Really just starting with the most basic. Things like even just congratulating itself for ruling out them. Really making sure your plea. Obsessing over practicing them every single day that's just the way easier it's often do you practice. Every day but it's something it has evolved over and when upper start practicing with apparently. Quit and her body. Up. And earthly problems so. An ancient practice for our everyday. And that evolved into practicing for two hours. Into taking institutional photos it looks like he just won. Like 5060. And acts like. Today. But having two jobs at the time it. And know well my practice has evolved to where it's that. Constantly traveling and constantly teaching is. There's no way to practice in the east but beak is obsessive. The. All leeches making. These immediate thirty minutes here. Forty minutes here. At least argument but that's Annie some people. Especially if you apps if you have other people care and if you need to make it work for. And you can't hold the standards of some. You can personalize Japan mostly. No family no jobs of his people like you actually go anywhere. And their hours a day and that's why they're practice looks though physically impressive. And I think it. The physical aspects are so. Unimportant. Re on matters that you're getting. That even with five minutes and that is still he should steal. Because even if you just congratulate yourself for rolling out the leasing commitments that it's just weeks. And then maybe you have the book at some of the scene from the poses. A psychic child. That's. And then you get out closing. Out just worked. Your packed them for their teens if you. For the little things and tell making it. And to something to. Time and Robert. Practicing. Anything. Approaching that he fair here. Forget to do those things in the ad that the amount of time expand on changes with every day. But it's like. It's. Us. Of course a lot of people won and to get it into your fitness activity because they want to lose weight do you answer that question is is you over the path. Have always felt kind of strange about this because I do's thing certain types that you can't be beneficial. Which at least. And particularly like in my experience the crummy days ago that opens. And actually. It's fluctuated in changed my weight has fluctuated changed along with by. In that there is appearing at Los about the use succeed. Over. Here. And it's the kind of thing at. Is not going to be and it's not going to be steady. It's not going to be eight. You know like if your really trying to lose weight. You should focus on nutrition focused on work that with fitness and that makes sense but fitness is not solely through two and even people who were really in through lots and nutrition to say that and I just feel like. The most important thing is make the practice adapt it or. If you get lenient. There will probably be major physical just I would really beat that Sestak now because I think it. The major changes inflection here and that means the year bodies. So you're writing about it when you went your first. With hill on you write this in all caps on. It's how did you get prepared to hear. Should have a long road and he told me that this that going to be at the end of the never Q. Because the first experience with. And I felt like I deserved being there. Sixteen a trying to equally high for the first time. Cautiously this is the worst experience and sweating in ways. It sway. These postures are stupid. People aren't like this holding down. And and but. Aren't exactly I was keen yes exactly sixteen. Air that your. And I think even just the slight as since the discomfort. Is gonna make that kind of person like this on. That's been asked yeah. So when I went to I was in graduate school. Or dark time. I'm usual that usual for anyone. Who's been there a dark time especially not someone who's prone to depression which I am. So I was just I was depressed about schools and I with colon. Break up there was just relieved. Aching muscles and. One Mac estimates Catholic Church eat your mother and change public not to act and I try to before and it was from conflict. And I have a personality like. And how it's like I'm that's. And that she has been at a Groupon path of their lives and I went and. The experience was exactly. Stow terribly still sweating in incredible ways still could barely green. But I realized it. Might. Not count. Just like wake up those school go to work at thing over and over and sleep duty. And I was very much sleepwalking. And in you know particularly and that's the view where York pushed so because of the heat because the intensity of the proposes. He reports though far from ports the have to just stick it out just the UEC piece that you're so the report. And that. Opportunity to check on both ways. Life to him because the game so much competence I realize that you know. There are some moments where I would be afraid of falling Erfurt failure. And in class a competency. I can't do because I'm not gonna do with this namely that went out or public sort of half try it really get now. Be early just. Just you might pop down upon a time to spot seam. And falling down and picking myself back. I mean it really did completely changed for I think for me because I realize that. I needed to feel discomfort and needed to be taken comfort and needed to see what to look beyond roundtree. And he gave so much confidence they gave me the confidence graduate school which is making me miserable and to change so many aspects of life. But it also kind of. Then became the stepping into the other part that story definitely with the catalyst for. A lot of things that went. Back to the discomfort. Upon I have. The single greatest gift for me. Is learning to beef still in discomfort. Is not run from it. Because he can't. You just have to sit an. And that has. That and every single aspect of my life just because something isn't comfortable or painful that doesn't mean I have to use drowning with alcohol. Stuff without food. Sleep through it. I can just sit with it and and do our. Just indoors to see what could happen let's source and because nothing good comes in this life that is not difficult to some degree. And it's very important to remember that. Everything that we've done in the past all the boundaries that we think for ourselves. That's not proof of what we're capable to and if you can sit with something that is not immediately comfortable for you. You will get used to the ideas because really all we're doing is having a temper tantrum over and over about the fact that this isn't the way that I thought it should be. It's not. Supporting Indian you know and an I found myself like feeling veered of the area again with feeling child like I feel very child like because. I'll be in the is just happens to me like arrogant obstinate that I don't practice that off and that is particularly challenging for me and not spill. And I'll need to keep us than it's like. But she could keep you just telling its healthy can't but maybe you could keep and that little each. It really does just touched so many. Surprised by how you're mr. Gramm has taken out and compass this that pays your life has techno salute fit completely. If it was my intention and I definitely did I have no intention of being a teacher I was not I you actively avoided becoming a teacher at that. There's so many of the teachers why do I need to be teachers there's literally thousands of teachers and it wasn't until. Well. Basically my father who is not into any of this heat when I'll let graduate school Hugh. I mean to say he was angry is to say it's an interest in studying and studying nonprofit arts management so that slate. Ever allotted to arts organizations theaters stance company's music festivals. And he was just a really disappointed in me he told me that this is the mistake of life you should never done this and he doesn't respect social media don't care about it all. It certainly didn't expect yoga at all and down a signing him about it. At this point I had some press notoriety from my social media accounts and he was way. Com unit amounts only that. People with I'm athletic. Yes actually if that's print media or purposely went out on Good Morning America he cared I have the briefing the group that plague other things. So I'm he's like we monthly payment on it's like. And easily become teacher would weary this earthly. Well I don't have the money to do it and he was how much as Catholics and thank you Leslie. Well we can figure and we 83000 to a due to conflict if this dude Hussein should do I have got to make this happen and the process of learning to teach people and learning to work with them south has been. So much more than I ever expected but it absolutely. Does Michael and I think that it. It's really important to just come no way your life happen as much as you can because you don't ET network which he can't. You Devern. Now the home practice something that is tricky for a lot of people because you may want to let me be don't think the right space. Dedicated space at little rug rats were in and around disturbing new or even animals. And you don't know what to do with sequences deed to you and what given day what time of day. What how do you start. What I asked in my home practice from nine I can afford practices studios when I left at school and have any money it was just. Polluting. And them it would just practice the poses that I felt comfortable with in the beginning which was literally like eight to ten poses. And even if I had that I mean it would be enough to just be practicing like. He took off some of them oppose them gorgeous out port subdued bring your arms and upper. Religious learning to breathe properly that at the great waited to start the practice but the way to release and until it is with on line classes and I know that a lot of people are applicants online classes I was really apprehensive in the beginning because. I tried claiming air exercise videos and never had any success and so. Even though I've heard people talk about class and I was like that's gonna work for me can I know what I half hour from me. And them but I found a website I love battled freely Clyde they did not work for them yoga -- dot com. Glow without the W at the and GL OGO. You know exactly. Yeah undergo back it I found an online studio that worked for me and I still take you vote and it's in the Oakland. So frank I feel like if you. Fine online classes that work for you and that's kind of athletica I have my classes code via com. I think really important to just try a bunch of them and tried different styles of you. But it if you're just starting at home it's really helpful. To someone. Saying things you should do because. Otherwise you'll push yourself out of your boundary change and I think now on the benefits of feeling like you're and a class eagle have to physically happened teachers there with you because one of the problems with. Practicing class. Is that we are so distracted by the other people. That even if the teacher is off even if you arts feeling yourself and it can still be ruined by the other people. So the home with the release and space to two built the practice it's definitely not easy. But you can do it anywhere my eyes are practicing at home and it appears small apartment and sharing with my ex girlfriend an art to animals and we had no space. And I was literally just rolling out the match in the one corner of the room we can make space and. I think that it. If you don't obsess over it in adults. Have everything perfect. You'll realize that what you as perfect as he people on the tarmac incident at their kids literally crawling on top of them when other as they do. Effort to read that combine your actor and he's quick to Amman where did. You think people currently. They're kids inspired by an amendment to products in judgment on it and see exactly I've found that though cute she placed her barbies. In two. And that wow look at look at how differently she's growing and getting this. Passions so yeah. It's that she sees she sees actually grandma mag. And that's now proposes what does that person there and yeah I just possibility there are children future yet oh to recommend that the circus tricks if you. You know they understand the hand stand the head over your neck. If he had appeared next art as we did. It over here yet and those things look really cool news. Is should you be striving to do them all if you have a good spiritual reason is that just part of an evolving practice. Just part of an. And I think that the more that you practice especially the mourn the. Facing. Doesn't that come up on. You'll want to know more about what comes through. A natural progression after a plank post is Bob costs microproze witches are without a fairly intense arm. Is the sort of thing where you get to that place not because Europe sad thing over. Practicing opposed but because you won a seat where adults your body ago where else your mind. Because the only reason to practice these postures. Is to take your back is to take your minding your body into a new place to to start to look into a new piece appears a. So each -- and especially the ones that are more advanced feels like an opportunity to learn something more months of. I think the problem is you putted on the Internet it's like. Look at what are you don't practice looks like this is what it has to be immensely. It's really it doesn't have to be displayed that same the same amount of work is going and have really working on your trying oppose at this going into really working. And. And the senior that you understand that the majority the easier it's can be to work pants and because so often. We frankly. It does name and I felt this way in the beginning I viciously. I just wanna do my big thing with its like Iceland who heads and frightened pregnant had stand then everything will be right in the world whenever recent. And then I remember trying for the first time without really knowing anything about I was gonna do. And almost like. He does apple because you don't know and. And there's no reason these student trying to need to work on your point B work our faith and. And I think that you've seen a prop when you see as a journey. With essentially. I feel like every time again these postures have been practicing for years where you're T been example. It's like the first time it's like. And then the more about it the more the follow up with its of that you're can't always something new to earn it's just. This really deep and beautiful process when you're in that process you're not thinking about. Doing this bike depot with. And I think that it. If you treated as a natural progression and those. Sherlock search districts didn't read. That. Now. The union and able to just turn into it and because it's gonna changes your life goes on news of the changes then I'm. It's now every time. Around someone has been practicing for decades and always just like I want fifth title of a new weed them apparently. Felicia practice like when you just been practicing for ten years serving twenty years because your life. His concert. And you are change. That is now a lot of people but you payment that was an act and we have here now some sense like. You are such a light. You are such an inspiration and such a joy and this book is fantastic. Really really enjoying it. I want to sit where everything is now everybody you yes Tami and your answer and handle it now. My name is just some JE SSA MY and mining and thank you for being here thank you so much for having.
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